I'm a lot of things. But for the time you read this, you can call me yours :)

Saturday, May 29, 2010

"Your mind goes to dark places and you wonder why I hide things. . ."

I had an actual thought to put here earlier. This has since disappeared. Now, I will post a smattering of my thoughts and see if my original thought appears within.

- I hate playing second fiddle, but often end up doing so due to being the "ugly friend". I wonder who would even speak to me if I didn't have access to the other guy/girl. The answer? Not many.

- I think people (me included) too often confuse pessimism with realism. Always looking on the bright side doesn't make me unrealistic, nor does the pessimist always end up being right. It's 50/50, just like many other things in life.

- Some days I want to pack a bag and leave everything behind me. Permanently. I write in things like this to prevent such thoughts from taking over. I feel this way more often than I care to admit, which may be why I cling to so many of these things. Which is funny, since there are so few worldly things I place any value in. Which leads to my next point. . .

- I have a terrible habit of considering everything transient. I can never rid myself the thought that no matter what I do, people will just tire of me, run out of use for me, and just leave. I feel like in a way many people I'm close to have, or will. There's no real explaining why, I just don't see a reason why they'd think any different. It's really not fair for them to, at least.

- I haven't written anything in a while. I miss it, but have no idea what I'd say if I started a new poem. Maybe later (said the clock to the deathbed).

That's it for today folks. Have a good morning, and in case you never grace this page again, afternoon, evening, night, baptism, bat mitzvah, prom, wedding, and funeral.

With love,

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